Aasha

I see her weep every day on her chair for us not having a child. Though our religions are not the same, we stepped out from the traditional comforts and stood for each other. In the beginning, our parents are not comfortable with our decision. We broke the walls of misunderstanding and proved our love to the parents, and made them change their mind. It's been 10 years since we married. The only thing which pinches our heart is us not having a child. Doctors say that she is having a Uterine Malformation. Grief shadowed us from all over and choked us into hell. Nothing made us happy again. It not only disturbed our lives but made a huge impact on our parent's life.

Those were the days where the Holy writings were misinterpreted and people fighting for unknown results. It is then where the innocent people lost their lives in this war of ignorance. It is then, where the human has lost his senses and turned out into a wild animal. It is then where the nation’s peace and security is jeopardized by terrorism. On the 25^th of August, 2007, the people took their loved ones to 'Gokul chat', who never returned their home again. I being a journalist, visited the place after the blasts. It was only flesh and blood all over the place. Red Cross took charge, and ambulances rushed from the hospitals.

There I’ve found Aasha under a wrecked table weeping for the loss of her parents. She is a year old baby and the only child to her parents, who work in the Chat Bandar. I went to her and took her into my arms. I kissed her and wiped off her tears. Then I gave her to one of the sisters in the Red Cross. From then on, it is only her in my dreams and actions. I couldn’t forget her adorable and innocent face. I couldn’t forget her soft fingers, which didn’t leave me when she is departing. I took the same matter to my wife and explained about the child. She was happy about the child and asked me why don’t adopt her. We rushed to the Red Cross society with our parents and signed all the documents required for the adoption. We took our little Love to our home.

From then on, our lives have changed. We named the baby Aasha as she filled hopes into our lives and made it a better place. It is for the first time after our marriage I’ve seen my wife happy. It is always a competition with my wife on carrying the child. I take her on my back and crawl like an elephant. As the days passed, I got busy covering news and articles on various acts of violence. One day as I reached home, I went right to Aasha and cuddled her, started playing with her. But she felt uncomfortable and started crying. Soon her mom came and took her from me.

From then on, she started crying whenever I took her into my arms and started hating me. I don’t know why she hated me all the time and was very depressed to see that. Her mom said that it is just a normal thing and told me not to worry. But it continued from then on. As the days passed, my daughter's relationship started fading, and I couldn’t digest that.

On 25^th of August 2008, exactly after a year I found her, I came back home after a very stressful day. I threw my car keys and a pack of cigarettes on the table where all Aasha’s toys lay. Aasha went to toys and started playing with them. After some time, we heard Aasha crying and soon ran to her. My wife took her into her arms and started consoling her. I was searching here and there to find some insect which I thought to be bitten her. Aasha surprisingly pointed towards the pack of cigarettes lying there and started crying. Then I realised the reason why Aasha felt uncomfortable whenever I tried playing with her. Being in a very stressful profession, I was addicted to smoking and continued even after the child touched our lives. It took me a lot more time to realise how foolish I was. Yes, there are obviously many diseases one can get affected by smoking, and they are of chronic nature. It takes some time to show up on oneself. But things like this happen to the individual, which affects daily activities and results in losing your inner peace. Which I believe to be much more ill than the biological deterioration of health. Soon I burnt all the packs of cigarettes I have at home and also my addiction towards smoking.